Are you a person interested in changing your life? You know, you’re tired of living current life situation “A” and want to get to life situation “B”, which of course is better.

You’re not alone. Almost everyone lives their life as a means to changing it. I’ve noticed two categories that people fall into:

• They are succeeding in life and seeking the next thing.
• They are dissatisfied with their current life, so they want something different.

It doesn’t matter which category you fall into because the bottom line is this: you are unhappy, therefore you want something more desirable. You want change. But wanting to change your life only keeps you stuck.

In 2006 I wanted to change my real estate business. Building and renovating one house at a time wasn’t enough for my ego. I wanted to construct three houses at one time and earn more money. I was tired of experiencing life situation A and wanted to get to life situation B. I was succeeding in my life, but seeking the next thing.

In 2007 I wanted to increase my dating frequency from one woman per month to dating two women per month. I was tired of experiencing life situation A and wanted to get to life situation B. Again, I was succeeding in my life, but seeking the next thing.

In 2008 I wanted to change my life because I was tired of being in debt and financially broke. I wanted enough money to clear my debt and buy the dreams I was envisioning – houses, cars, and more things. I hated life situation A and wanted to get to life situation B. In other words, I was dissatisfied with my current life and wanted something different.

By 2009 I felt extremely pathetic and unworthy. At this point, I have been failing for two years straight and depression was grabbing hold of me. I began doing every law of attraction, meditation, and ho’oponopono trick in the book in hopes for a better life. I was desperate. I wanted – no I needed change. I was tired of experiencing life situation A and wanted to get to life situation B. Again, I was dissatisfied with my current life and wanted something different.

Looking back upon my life I realized that no matter what life situation I was in, the present moment and what I had now was never good enough; therefore, I suffered.

Suffering can last forever because its intensity changes. You could be experiencing massive external suffering, such as death of a loved one, being broke, bankruptcy, or the height of an addiction. Or, your suffering could be subtle, in which you have a continual underlying uneasiness.

How do you get out of suffering and become free? The way out of suffering is to stop trying to get out of suffering.

The problem is wanting to change your life. What that says is you are not happy with your current life, so you want to create a new one. You want to get from one point to another. The key word here is want. Wanting to change your life is much different than being on a growth path. Wanting to change your life is being resistant to what is in life. And since resistance is your state of consciousness, you produce more resistance and that’s why you stay stuck in a downward spiral.

Growth is enjoying the journey of life for the sake of the journey, not for the possible destination. Do not want to change your life. Rather, be life itself and you’ll naturally evolve and grow with abundance.

Being life itself is truth. You are not separate from life, you are life in itself. The world tells you that you have a life – my achievements, my roles, my problems, and my feelings – and there’s a life outside of you in the world. That’s an illusion and that’s why you suffer.

“Prove that we are not separate entities from each other and from life but are Life itself,” someone demands.

When does anything and everything only happen? For example, when does it snow? When is it warm or sunny out? When do you feel love? When do you see love? When do you know of violence? When do you know of hate? When does the world happen? Where does your Mother, Father, significant other, and dog exist? Only in your awareness. The whole world only happens when you are there to observe it. Whether it be a thought, feeling, or hard evidence, the world only happens when you are there watching it happen.

“But what about the millions of people that I know of who are starving in third world countries?” someone asks.

True. But you only know of it because you think about it. If you don’t think about it, then there are not millions of people starving, are there? It seems cold-hearted to deny the fact that there are starving people in the world, but that’s not the point. I’m not saying don’t do anything about it. No. I’m saying that there are starving people in the world only because you entertain the thought and possibility that there are.

Okay. Let’s try this from a different angle. The condition of sleep is definitive proof that you are Life and not a separate entity from it. When you go to sleep at night, one world comes to an end and another world begins, which are your dreams. You lay your head on your pillow, close your eyes, and eventually the thoughts stop. Time stands still and you have no awareness of an outside world. There are not any problems, starving people, hate, or anyone in the world brushing their teeth in that moment. You are either in a deep void of emptiness or in another manifested world – your dreams.

The alarm goes off or a full bladder wakes you up and you’re back in waking consciousness. The dream world (or is that the real world, hmmm…) comes to an end and you’re back in a world that you can see, touch, hear, taste, feel, and smell. Any and all worlds only happen when you are there to observe it.

When you merge with Life and become it, rather than a separate entity from it, Life works for you and there is nothing you cannot do that yields abundance. The problem is the concept of you and the goal (if there is such a thing) is to transcend you, the personality, and go beyond it into a free functioning human being.

Becoming free functioning

A free functioning human being (FFHB) is someone who is sticky, but never stuck. In other words, picture being at a play ground swinging on the monkey bars. The free functioning human being has one hand stuck on the bar while the other hand is moving freely to the next bar. The FFHB is never stuck and always evolving and growing enjoying the monkey bars called Life.

The stuck human being or the one wanting to change is holding on with both hands to a single monkey bar praying not to fall. And since the stuck human being is gripping on for dear life, she/he has no choice but to fall.

Becoming free functioning means shifting from the “I want to change my life” attitude to “I am life and lack nothing” state of consciousness. You can make this shift by seeking without seeking, which is called the “non-seeking mind.”

The non-seeking mind

Non-seeking means that you grow, evolve, challenge yourself, and go after goals from a non-attached state of being. What this means is that you allow life to move in and through you and manifest from a place of fullness rather than want. You become a conscious participant of creating in the world without the need or want for happiness, fulfillment, or aliveness in what you do or create.

Anytime I sit and down and write, whether it’s a novel, article, song, or… anything, I can feel myself coming from the non-seeking mind. I am attentive and focused on the present moment and the enjoyment of the writing process. There isn’t a concern for producing and getting results. I don’t feel stressed for time or in a hurry. I also do not feel as if I’m doing the creating, but rather, the creating is happening in and through me.

What there is is space and the aliveness of right now. There is a movement between thinking and no thinking and the awareness around both. There is true quality in this moment and whatever the result may be, quality will be embedded in it. What’s primary is the happening of now. What’s relative and secondary are the results.

Becoming the non-seeking mind is a subtle shift in consciousness while you create. Non-seeking is not an intention or “doing” (though it may appear that way); it’s being.

Your practice is to thoroughly immerse yourself in whatever is required by the present moment. If you are writing, write fully. If you are emailing, email fully. If you are working, give your full attention to the task at hand. If you are angry, know and be the voice of anger. If you are fearful, fully be the fear and accept it. Wanting to be somewhere or something other than where or what you presently are is dysfunction and the stuck human being.

Tell me how you can change what already is? You can’t. But you can perpetuate what already is by resisting.

Start with small processes

Brush your teeth with your full attention on brushing. Taste the toothpaste and feel the bristles glide upon your teeth. Take a shower with your full attention on the shower. Feel the water hit your body; notice the water temperature; notice your breathing and feel the soap lathering on your body. If you start thinking, honor that thinking and notice the thoughts, but do not follow them.

As you make small efforts day in and day out, non-seeking will become your natural state. Your thoughts will become less and less and the thinking mind will then become a servant to your creation. I suggest making a list of 3 to 4 mundane activities and come from a non-seeking mind while engaged in those activities. Here’s my list. Feel free to copy it or invent your own:

• Brushing my teeth
• Showering
• Driving to and from work

So, now the big question: Are you still interested in changing your life? Do want to get from point A to point B in order to be happy, fulfilled, or feel alive? Wanting to change your life makes you appear to be separate from life. You add resistance and become stuck with two hands on the monkey bars.

When you merge with Life and become it, rather than a separate entity from it, Life works for you and there is nothing you cannot do that yields abundance. The way to merge with Life is to realize you are Life. Become the free functioning human being by becoming the non-seeking entity. Notice your desire to create and do things in the world, but do not depend on what you do to bring happiness, fulfillment, and aliveness. Give your fullest attention to whatever is required by this moment and you’ll be the One Life.